Thanks to an alert reader for pointing out this You Tube video about Annandale, titled, “Welcome Home to the Shithole of Annandale, VA,” posted by FlyingOverTr0ut a couple of months ago.
The video is hilarious, although it’s pretty negative, so we were curious. Who is FlyingOverTr0ut and why does he hate Annandale so much?
In response to an email from the Annandale Blog, FlyingOverTr0ut says his real name is “Angelo Mike” and lists his occupation as “full-time dating coach and motivational speaker.”
“I have had the great misfortune of living in Annandale for the past year. I grew up nearby but was happily unaware of this city’s existence,” Angelo Mike says.
“As a man of science, I merely wished to inform possible newcomers to Annandale, VA, or deadbeat dads and felons in general who may not be aware of the city just what it has to offer,” he says. “I did the research and my video is backed by 100 percent peer-reviewed science. Anyone who disagrees with anything I said in the video is wrong and should be caned.”
“On a more existential level, I made the video because I realized (as anyone who lives in Annandale is prone to do) just how cold and indifferent the universe is to human life,” Angelo Mike continues. “It doesn't know we’re here and wouldn’t notice if we’re not here. Annandale is merely a prism which brings this fact into focus.”
“On a psychological level, each night in Annandale,” he says, “the flesh melts off my bones and seeps through the rocks and into the ground. Yet each day I put myself back together, piece by piece. Each night I wish for death, but it never comes. Annihilation would be too good for me at this point. Her promise of release a cruel mockery of my distress. I am too much of a coward to embrace the sweet fruit of oblivion, so my fate is in this void between the finite and the infinite, an abyssal demon in the screaming agony. Though even demons know that people are unhappy in hell.”
“Then fate’s inexorable churning yielded an even worse realization; that perhaps there is a god, but that he has turned his face from me. This is the unrelenting horror of my day-to-day life which merely feels like one long day at this point, here in Annandale,” he says. “So that’s why I made the video.”